| Fuck Virgin |
[14 Apr 2008|08:24pm] |
Read the following article. Watch this video. Do your own research and educate yourself. For those of you who are political, this cause is far more dire then what asshole sits in power today. Net Neutrality has been something I've become increasingly more informed on over the past few years and for the past few years its been a harder fought battle then ever. Don't allow these douchebags to take away not only your voice but your freedom to information and communication.
Virgin is relying on our passive behavior to just pass this by. The government does it all the time but there is one difference between the two battlefields. In your flesh most of us won't say shit, and if we say it we don't go through with it. Since I've started using the internet, everyone has talked about internet tough guys. That everyones brave and outspoken on the internet.
Be a tough guy. Fuck Virgin. Do not let them set the new standard for the internet. Do not use their shit, do not go to Virgin owned sites. Do not buy their music or go to their shitty concerts. Cancel your terrible phone service with them. You have the ability to 'refuse' to allow them to set this precedent. This is the internet, where everyone has a voice apparently or so I'm told every time some ass trolls a thread or some tough guy infuriates a hundred people with a randomly placed bit of ignorance. Point your ignorance and belligerence where it belongs.
Virgin has EARNED it by taking you for granted and spitting directly in your face.
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The new CEO of Virgin Media, Neil Berkett, has openly stated in an interview that they think net neutrality is “a load of bollocks” and claimed they're already doing deals to deliver some people’s content faster than others. They would then put websites and services that don't pay Virgin in the "slow lane", meaning those sites would load slowly and cause most users to give up using them, feeling forced to use whatever Virgin wants to push through their network.
This is not the first time an internet provider infringes upon net neutrality, but it is the first time that an ISP so brutally states that they simply plan to limit internet access to a television-like system in which the access provider completely regulates the content you have access to.
Virgin Media has over 3.5 million customers in the UK and the real danger is that when they start applying this system to their network, all major internet providers around the globe will soon follow the trend. Because this is exactly what major ISP's have been wanting to do for years.
But we can stop it.
If the masses of the internet react against this, we will set an example of what happens when one provider tries to take away our freedom. We will make it very clear that any ISP who tries to infringe upon net neutrality will see its popularity go down the drain because the users don't accept it. And we'll see to it that only the providers who care about safeguarding our internet freedom have our support.
Speak out in any way you can and spread the word.
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| Venetia: Humanity |
[07 Feb 2008|02:56pm] |
Damian Szydlo (Neverclock Photography) is pleased to introduce to you the concept of a growing project soon to find its way to the Hamilton/Toronto art scene. Venetia: Humanity is posed to be not only his first true series but his crowning achievement as well. Eight fine art photographs aimed to appear on gallery walls. Employing quality, authentic Venetian masks created by New Orleans' Mask Italia (www.maskitalia.com), the fashions of Toronto's Decadent Designs (www.decadentdesigns.ca) and the hair styling of Hamilton's Carolyn Ferris this series promises to deliver a vision truly unique.
Born of his personal view on humanity and the weight consequence and expectation placed upon the soul, the series will attempt to capture perhaps the spirits greatest fantasy. Freedom. The masks will fulfill their classic intention, Venetian masks were historically employed to protect their owners identity during the course of a decadent masquerade party/ball. This would allow for the reveler to behave in a manner that might otherwise ruin his or her reputation, freeing the consequence of identity to ones action and completing a sense of unfettered anonymity. All while allowing him/her to return to mundane life after the fantasy was over. The irony should not be dismissed, that we as a species only truly and wholly become ourselves by becoming something else. Our sense of identity is forged by the responsibility and role placed upon us, our behavior dictated by how others might view us.
The reality of it is that the face we wear, that we present to the world everyday is our mask and the mask becomes our true identity.
After all eight images find completion; they will appear on walls as framed 11x14 photographs. The masks used in the images will be mounted to the frame, leaving the freedom so fleetingly realized as a permanent attachment to the moment. There will also be a limited run of signed prints available for purchase through the artist.
To contact the photographer for more info, interest in posing for or interest on presenting Venetia: Humanity please email neverclock@gmail.com
To join the mailing list for Venetia: Humanity include the initials ML at the beginning of your subject.
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| Apartment |
[23 Jan 2008|11:57pm] |
I found a new place.
Its nice, the right size for me I think. Hardwood floors, which everyone knows I'm a huge fan of. Living room, dining room areas. The bedroom is a bit small but should leave enough space for my Bed and a bit of walking room. Bathroom is small but will suit my needs and is renovated. Kitchen similar. Best thing is its on the top floor of a three story building so no assholes above me making noise. Not a bad price either, 580 + Hydro. The living room will be enough room for my American friends to crash in when they visit in March. Finally getting to meet Alex, I'm sure you remember her Ray, as I tried to sell her to you for about $2000 a couple years ago to her dismay. Plus, chances are her Californian self will get to fucking experience snow again.
10 Holton South, which makes me in walking distance to you, Igor. Just a few blocks past Main & Sherman.
I'm thinking of staging the move around the 16th of Feb. if all goes according to plan (I can move in on the 15th but thats a Fri). I could use a few good arms to help me carry a few things. It'll only be one small truck load, the only furniture I'm really bringing is a light dresser, bed and desk plus my boxes and a few other things. Getting a new couch on credit once I move in so the delivery guys can worry about that.
Scheduling my eye test this weekend I think, finally getting it done and facing the music on it. Its been awhile since I admitted my poor eyesight but I don't know... put it off. Its not like I thought it would get any better but its like I didn't have to truly face it if I didn't get diagnosed with a problem. I'm fucked up that way and its kept me from driving as well as enough other things for too long. Time for growing up in that respect I guess, face my own mortality and all.
I guess thats about it. Trying to stay positive and optimistic. I think I'm actually starting to accomplish it too. Meeting a few new people, finding alot of new things about myself. A long hard look in the mirror has done me some good and for the first time in awhile I'm catching up to the person I've become. Sometimes I've trouble with making peace with myself... always trying to fix too much.
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| So... |
[03 Jan 2008|10:07pm] |
Starting the new year fresh, trying to get things into gear and get out of the house and maybe use this thing more. Need something to write my positive thoughts in again and leave the negative ones in my own head. Went for a meeting today about a new shoot. Going to be wicked and conceptual, I feel my work is getting back on track again. Saying things that it hasn't said in awhile while still doing what I want it to do. I'm looking for a microphone stand if anyone has one, so putting the word out to anyone who knows musicians (I know you know a couple, Markus if your reading this, by the way, miss you bro get in touch).
My visit to the mall was of duel purpose of course. Sleep Country is across the street. After laying on a few beds and surprisingly being able to tell the difference between comfort, due to funds I hesitantly settled on a $600 rather average queen sized bed. For the hell of it though, I had them run a credit check and holy shit, I have good credit I guess. I didn't think I did. Anyhow, they approved me for a 12 month no payment plan for an amazing bed, so fuck the average one. Going to throw a large chunk of it on tomorrow so I don't have as much to pay over the next 12 incase things get really tight.
Looking at some more new places this week. I'll be out of here by the end of the month for sure which is of great relief to me, as long as I can find a place that I like well enough.
Shopping List:
Bed: Check
Microwave: Still Looking
New Couch: Since credit is good, we'll see about it.
Utensils & Plates: Check
Pots: Apparently the ones from the SHQ were indeed taken by Derek so I have them back which is a bonus. They weren't amazing, but they weren't exactly bad either.
Sanity and Peace of Mind: Thats a negative, but I'm working on it. I've accepted that a large chunk of my mind lives in the past, and apparently I can't let go.
Also, as a final note. I'm sorry to Jennie if I made you feel uncomfortable today. When I ran into you, I was excited to see you and over ran logic.
Thats it from me. Trying to stay up, and I'll be hitting the Kingdom for the final night its open. For old times sake, an era is finally over and closure is had. That place has been dead for me for awhile, part of me is happy to see it close and another part of me is sad for what we lost. It is somehow a relief regardless, like an old one thats been struggling to hold onto life for far too long finally passing away.
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| New Years: The Truth |
[01 Jan 2008|06:11am] |
2007. It'll go down in my life as a year of regret. I made a large post about it, deleted it in turn because some things are truly no ones business but my own. For those who know me however I give you this insight next time you may think to tell me things will work out, will be okay. Not that anyone did tonight but rather for the future.
Imagine if at the stroke of midnight tonight I could never take another photo again. That I could see beautiful images in my mind still, but every time I touched the shutter it would never fire. Ever again. Then imagine what it would feel like if I came to realize that the things I've done in 2007, the choices I've made brought me to this place. That really, I had no one to truly blame but myself, and taking the incredible gift I'd been granted for granted.
Multiply this feeling by two as in reality, photography was a distant second passion though in the end... I didn't do a good enough job expressing that. But humour me. Then imagine what it must honestly feel like to know that hollow will never be filled, no matter how many people say things will change or that things will be okay. Then know that ultimately you have no one else to blame but yourself for watching that beautiful thing slip through your fingers, and have been too proud of god knows what to save it.
You live with that, and tell me to regret nothing.
All the success in the world. Becoming the person I should be, need to be. Money, a career. All of it will never bring back what I've lost. 40 years will pass and I know right now that I'll regret this year for the rest of my life as the day I lost myself the thing that mattered to me most of all. That when she looks back on it, all she'll remember is what I'd become, not who I am. Not the man she fell in love with. She'll see me as another disappointment in a long line of them.
I only live with this because I must, I carry on because there is nothing else to do, no other option. For those who are concerned, emailing me. Please don't be. I'll come around, baby steps you know?
Last but not least, not because I think anyone has done this. But if you look poorly on Jennie at all for this, if you use my grief for ill will. I'll rip your fucking throat out. She did best by her heart, and this hasn't been easy on either one of us, shes got her own demons to fight. Shes not going anywhere.
These are just my thoughts, and I'm tired of saying them. Explaining them and my failure as both a provider and a loving boyfriend. I don't want to explain it ever again, its hard to raise my chin when I have to constantly admit my defeat. I know what I did wrong, and hold no illusions.
These are my feelings as I feel them, no sympathy please, comments are disabled. I'm done kicking myself. All I'm left with now is the truth.
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| 25th |
[25 Dec 2007|06:37pm] |
I managed to quit Christmas this year after all. Thought it might be harder somehow.
I'll see some of you on the 31st for New Years, I'll be going out for it.
So for what its worth, Happy Festivus.
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| A Note |
[05 Dec 2007|09:33pm] |
I have dreamed a dream, and now that dream is gone for me.
I don't know what else to say but quote someone else, really. A year and nothing from me and now this in a most dismal time.
Don't know why the fuck I logged onto this thing anyway. I just can't ever let go.
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| A Rare Post |
[23 Dec 2006|08:08pm] |
Yes I've been elusive, as per the norm now adays. I just wanted to get on here and wish anyone still reading this thing a Merry Christmas. Life has been good, probubly better then its ever been. Jennie and I are still just as facinated with each other as we were the day we started dating and I can say, for the most part in my personal life I'm getting everything I've ever wanted.
So special hellos and seasons greetings to my friends, you know who you are. Even Markus who wants no such Merry Christmas wishes but he gets them regardless.
Also to Angel and Greg, it has been a very long while since I've caught up with you guys at all and I hope Yule is treating you well... as well ;)
And of course to my lovely girlfriend, yes I do occasionally post. I love you.
That is all. See you all around.
~Damian
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| Update on Me |
[20 Sep 2006|06:14pm] |
So for those who are not up to speed on my life as I've not posted here in sometime. Yes I'm still alive. Thanks for the nudge. You know who you are ;)
Life is good. Photography is back on track and it feels amazing to be working on it again. Better yet, I'm possibly the happiest I've been in a very long time though sometimes it doesn't show. Its good to say I love you on a daily basis and mean it 110%, me and Jennie are going very well and she makes me more proud everyday. I've tried to make realationships work in the past. Tried very hard to fall in love and it hasn't worked out in a very long time on my side despite it. Either way, without a doubt shes an amazing match for me and we continue to push on through time yet the excitement of it has still never dulled.
Other then that, life continues the same as always. The SHQ (My house) is as amazing as it always was. Derek, my brother, lives here with me now and my original room-mates have moved on. Upstairs is home to good friends as well and we make an effort to get together at least once a week to have people come over and such. Usually organized by Igor. I have enough money to pay bills, eat and still go out from time to time so I really have nothing to complain about.
Anyhow, thats me and there it is.
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| Yeah |
[06 Jun 2006|04:17pm] |
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Happy 666. Stomp the shit out of an emo kid today and win a prize in hell when you eventually get there. I hear these are the rules and I love prizes. Heather is apparantly coming over to show me her new pup today, the temptation will be high but shes the only emo kid in the world I actually like so she gets to live. Maybe I won't be getting my 'Fucked up an Emo Kid on 666' badge this century. Damn.
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| As a Note |
[31 May 2006|10:14pm] |
I just saw X-Men 3. I want my $11 back not to mention the 2 hours of my life I spent watching that piece of shit. Without a bit of hesitation I would like to once again make mention that the director is a steaming bag of dicks and I cannot recommend more if you have not seen this thief of anal virginity do not.
On another note though, I would like to mention that I more then ever would give it to Ms. Romijin or however you spell her name.
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| Sex Survey? |
[10 Apr 2006|06:14pm] |
This is fucking incriminating for me, but what the hell. Everyone is doing it, and its no ones buisness so it should make me popular... right?
Wrong. Haha, fuck that stupid test. Just know that there are alot of yes answers to questions that arn't 'have you kissed someone of the same sex'. Truthfully, I just don't want to answer questions like have you ever slept with 2 people in 24 hours... fuck... I think I just did.
That is all.
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| Kingdom |
[07 Apr 2006|05:30pm] |
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I miss Kingdom. Odd words to be sure. Too sick to go out tonight. Seeing as its Igors party next Friday, 3 weeks is an unusually long time for me not bothereing with the club. Just that I miss certain people I don't ever get to see anywhere else but at that place. Oh well. I'll be back soon enough.
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| I Hate This World |
[03 Apr 2006|09:13pm] |
I just had to tell a good friend of mine, someone who would give the shirt off his back for anyone that he can't live here anymore. The reasons are not a concearn of anyone really. All in all I'm quite divided and in the end, some things just have to happen, and everyone has to do what they have to do. I hope when all is said and done he will not come to resent me.
On that painful note... the SHQ has an empty room now for rent. Its a good place to live, if you need a place to stay we can talk and if I think it would be a livable situation, the room is yours and so is your privacy. Things are usually like I said, pretty calm during the week and everyone is so in and out. Plus, summer is going to be good, Igor is moving in upstairs so its going to be barbaques and shit.
Fuck... I feel like hell... but now that its done at least things are a little more clear. It doesn't make it any easier though...
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| A Note |
[03 Apr 2006|12:54am] |
You worry, its not truly needed but appreciated. My patience for the things I consider worth it is almost boundless, and you are more then worth it. You have my trust and my utmost attention. I'd like to say 'nothing is going to screw this up' but its come back to bite me in the face before. I'm not going to jinx it. So instead I'll say I have an incredible amount of faith that this could just be something incredible... and if we fuck this up we only have ourselves and an impossible lack of understanding or trying to blame.
Your in my thoughts, be strong. This has only just started and I ain't going anywhere.
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| Rage |
[27 Mar 2006|06:32pm] |
My day went well. I planned on coming home and writing this, a simple 3 word entry largly brought about by a certain someone.
"I feel amazing."
Now, word has gotten back to me that someone is fucking with me. Someone who clearly has no idea about the state of my life or about the people closest to me. Just because I have a close friend, who also happens to have tits, does not mean there is anything going on despite what I might have once wanted.
After everything I've been through with women over the past few years. After all your time knowing me, and my character. I don't think I've been anything but honest to the whole lot of you over the years... have I EVER given anyone the notion that I fuck around with people? Why would you try and warn someone about me? ME? I don't know who it is yet... or why you'd try to put the gaurd up of a person I respect, and another person that I am interested in... planting seeds of doubt. Fortunatly she wasn't too worried about it because we had already talked about this in the past... why? Because I don't fuck around! I make sure shit is clear and out in the open with the people that need to know.
I'm giving whoever it was, as it has to be someone I consider a friend... one chance to explain themselves. I don't know who it is at this point, or why you would have done what you have done, or if its even as severe as the grapevine would have it...
I do not play games with people. Do not get involved with my buisness and personal life unless I involve you.
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| So |
[13 Mar 2006|06:11pm] |
Wrote a big cryptic email about bad things and good things in my life and shit changing and turning over. It was too long and drawn out for my taste and really, yeah way too open to misinterpretation. I'm not happy with some people, and extreamly happy with others. We'll leave it at that.
Saterday was fucking amazing in a stay at home, chill out sort of way. I just had to note that.
Maybe will be at Hybrid this weekend. I don't really like the place much, in contrast to many peoples opinions of it I know. It doesn't feel like home, and I certainly don't feel the need for a 'change of scene' or a 'get away from the drama' because if I wanted either of those two I just wouldn't go to Kingdom anymore at all. Only reason at all that I'll end up there is to hang out with Igor, since we don't get to do much shinanigans now adays. So over the next month I'll have to make sure I do the TO thing whether I want to or not, I hate that fucking town. Place seriously needs to be fumigated. Way too many posers and 'goth' dickheads. I'm not sure that goth is the cool thing to be anymore, I wonder what name they'll choose this week to discribe and lable their 'unlable-able' selves. Pansy fuckers don't have a bit of steel in their blood, just want to look 'creepy'. Only a handfull of residents that I like to see, like Sara and Rod for starters.
Anyway, thats it for me. Fuck LJ.
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| Third Post in a Day... never again |
[25 Feb 2006|07:42pm] |
So on the last two posts i've done, I talked music in some way. Made me wonder to myself my favorite 10 songs of the past few years of my life. So here they are in order, best is last of course.
10. 'Rebel Yell' by Billy Idol
9. 'I Stand Alone' by Godsmack
8. 'Ich Bin Ein Auslander' by Pop Will Eat Itself
7. 'Hurt' by Nine Inch Nails
6. 'Jesus Built My Hotrod' by Ministry
5. 'Sonne' by Rammstein
4. 'The Death of Music' by The Devin Townsand Band - Ocean Machine/Biomech
3. 'AAA' by Strapping Young Lad
2. 'Anarchy' by KMFDM
1. 'The Becoming' by Nine Inch Nails
I know its hard, and of course there could be ones I forgot or that you might forget, but roughly... what are your ten favorites of the last say, 5 years of your life. Five years makes it easier.
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| BTW |
[25 Feb 2006|07:29pm] |
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Seeing Devin Townsend in TO tomorrow at Lee's Palace. Fuck Opeth. I only wanted to go to that concert to see Devy anyway, getting to see him headline his own act will be much more satisfying. With any luck, I'll get to meet him.
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| Boom Boom as They Came a Little Closer |
[25 Feb 2006|06:44pm] |
Ever feel as if you might be loosing it? Loosing yourself? Growing more violent, caring far less then you should? People disgust you more and more and you want to pull farther back into yourself though you realize to do so you'd forfit the things that in essence, really are all that is keeping you human. Its really not as bad as all that, as I've said before in many ways things are good, I'm content with much. In ways, this becoming is something old, and the anger and hate is fuel. To get things done. It really is walking a fine line, to make sure that things stay in place, that all the breakers and switches are properly set and in place so the whole thing doesn't blow... while running faster and harder then it perhaps otherwise could. I feel like nothing can stop me and my confidence is growing with this black shit again. Its been two years now really since it was here, when I'd snap jaws down on the slightest thing. When I wouldn't tolerate excuses or mediocrity.
I want to be ugly.
I want to be angry.
I don't want to be human.
I want to burn up brilliantly.
All this being said, there is a conflict. I firmly belive that everyone is born either good or bad, that its not only experience that guides our personalities growth. That there is something inside. I was blessed or cursed with alot of light. I know I'm a good person, and I realize at my worst I'll always make a moral discision to do the right thing and to protect those who mean something to me. So take all this as advanced warning, those who fuck with me or the people I consider close will not be granted a smile and a hug from this point on. Those who take people for granted, and expect to find my ear as solace won't find it at all. Remember, forgivness is over-rated, once a piece of shit always a piece of shit. Reformation is a great lie, and what one must ask oneself is this. Is your life honestly long enough to tolerate people who contribute nothing at all to that life? How much time do you have to waste?
This of course isn't pointed at any certain event but rather at alot of things, and is a reflection of my feelings to myself and to people who have and are tolerating bullshit because of pity. Mercy is an amazingly nobel gift, pity is its midget twin brother. Pull your weight motherfuckers.
All this brought to you while listening to one of my new favorite songs, AAA by Strapping Young Lad. Honestly, it sounds like a reflection of my life, so I've got to love it right up at the top with 'The Becoming'. I'll leave you with the lyrics.
Devy In The Corner Of His Teen Year
Born To Run Away
Children In The Middle With The Village Idiot
So He Never Made The Potty Grade
Now Maybe He Pulled A Little Closer
Cold In A Mousy Way
Boom Boom As They Came A Little Closer
Put A Bolt In The Curse Today
Now Devy Has To Eat It In His Own Way
Broke In A Dirty Way
Boom Boom Is The Beating That I Hear In The Night
But No One Hears, So No One Knows...
No And No One Fucks With Me
Devy Wants A Word With The Master
No Need To Run Away
Down On The Road Isn't Easy,
But I Never Would Back Away...
Boom Boom In The Morning With The Night Sounds
No Way To Run Away
Boom Boom As The Boredome Of Monogamy
Hits One More Time...
No One Must Know...
No One Must Know...
No One Must Know...
No One Must Know This Machine...
Devy Got A Taste Of Some Black Shit
Born In Another Way
And It Probably Would Have Been Easy,
But It Never Worked Out That Way
Boom Boom In The Corner With The Well - Soiled
Bound To Amalgamate
Boom Boom As It Kills The Inhibitions
...No More Games
No One Must Know...
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